The headache should be gone by now.
I figured it could have been there for one of two reasons:
A. I wore a headband today
B. I chose green tea over coffee this morning
Now that the headband is off and I’ve ingested a venti iced coffee, I know it was neither.
I was sitting there, reading. Trying to grasp it, reading over and over until it was in my head, this Cross-Cultural Psychology chapter 10. A playlist for studying drowning out the conversations surrounding me, the ones I would otherwise listen in on. Sitting there, looking down, then up as he walked in and she walked out. Down again, focus… focus. Emails. Group meeting time. Missed notes. Text messages. Flight plans. To do lists and shopping lists. Study lists and don’t forget to sign up for classes. Study abroad. Work and finish that training manual. Get rest and don’t get sick. Home and that damn dog won’t stop barking. Why do these eggs keep sticking to this pan? I swear I’m using enough butter. Wash the dishes just to dirty them again. Which classes do I need to take? Why aren’t they open. Why didn’t I sign up earlier? Why is my head still hurting? It was good to see those people today. Unexpected things, places, people can change the course of your day.. your life really. Order in? Take out? No, keep your money, lose an egg. Half of it will stick to the pan anyways. Study or find classes? Both. More green tea. You can’t get sick! Not tonight. Not this week. Not until May 20, please. Vitamins galore. Don’t forget to change that dentist appointment. And email that teacher. And figure your life out. Love come down…
As I sat at Starbucks a great deal of excitement about the next month came over me. I am looking forward to:
The feeling I will feel after my last final on Friday.
A weekend of friends. Not the show.
Boarding that plane.
Colour.
Seeing new places, new people (meeting a friend!), learning new things.
And boarding that plane.
Seeing my two favorite cousins.
The vespa of love.
It’s in Your hands, like a million grains of sand
I can’t plan my life out. It probably won’t go the way I plan it anyways. A couple years ago, where I am now was not what I had in mind. But I like this better anyways. I have been worrying and trying to figure out my future lately… and for what? So I can focus so much on what’s ahead that I miss out on what is now? No. He knows where I’m going, He’ll clue me in along the way. I am not in a hurry (and despite the way the rest of my siblings did things… I am not them.. I am me). “Plan to be surprised.”
More in mind… I think. Out of time, study then rest.
:::
There is only the moment. The now. Only what you are experiencing at this second is real. This does not mean , live for the moment. It means you live the moment. A very different thing. There’s value in the past. After all, it brought you to where you are. There’s value in the future, but it lies in the dream, for who can predict tomorrow? Only the moment has true value, for it’s here. Love knows this–it doesn’t look back–it experiences the past and takes the best from it. It doesn’t look forward. It knows that tomorrow’s dream remains waiting and may never come. Love is now! It is only in the “now” that love is reality. Love has meaning only as it is experienced in the now. If one is looking at a flower, he is one with the flower; if one is reading, he is totally absorbed; if one is listening to music, he goes with the sound; if one is talking or listening to another, he is the other.
-Leo Buscaglia
“Love”, p73
Tags: Buscaglia
